Wednesday, March 02, 2022

Singin' In Ukraine

We're gonna anniversarize whilst we rhetoricize a little bit, about what the wholly-unauthorized intelligence agencies' mass media has everyone metastasizing their Facebook avatars into this week.

So to summarize the shitshow, in 2014 the US intel spooklets did what they love to do in oil-rich regions, and helped engineer the usual transfer of power from someone they didn't feel supported multinational capitalism enough to someone who they thought would.

The cutie pie they installed -- 
yes, he has sat atop my HoSILF list since taking the reins -- was apparently qualified because he had played the president of Ukraine on a popular TV situation comedy prior to the 2014 shenanigans. No, you couldn't make this stuff up if you were Ronald Reagan starring opposite a strung-out Bonobo ape in the Universal Studios production of Bedtime for Bumbaclaat, so I won't try.

Read: homeboy's likable, adorably sexy, but deeply inexperienced and pliable like our Shadow Government likes 'em, and with little hope 
of governing a divided country where a seriously right wing, white supremacist element has been a thing since before the CIA even existed... and one that makes the Proud Boys look like bingo night at the B'nai B'rith.

Now -- as the intel dicks intended to provoke 8 years ago, when alleged Liberal meta-messiah
 Obama had them do their (by then long-patented) regime-change clandesto-wizardry -- the (vile, disgusting, primitive, and likely so closeted a homosexual he makes Ted Haggard look like Ted Nugent) head douchebag of the Formerly Big Deal Zip Code to the Immediate East of Ukraine has invaded, and is running roughshod with his military where he really doesn't belong.
This, according to him, because the crazed, jackbooted Azov freaks the CIA could somehow Nazi coming -- and, of course, the ever-encroaching NATO outposts -- are getting too close to his borders, and presumably he doesn't want them in too near a proximity to where they'll catcall when he rides, shirtless, on his horse through Red Square at the next big Pride Parade.
 He even inserted a whole mini-tirade straight out of Anita Bryant's 1979 Greatest Shits LP into his big speech to the nation -- in which he doth protested too much about the depraved Western forces' attempt to subvert glorious, extremely masculine Russia with tawdry, effeminate and civilization-rotting gayness -- if you think I'm making this up or exaggerating. Poor old queen probably has his generals convinced Jeffree Star is gonna ride a rainbow-striped M1 Abrams tank up to the Kremlin and redecorate in 77 shades of Luscious Lavender.

All this geopolitical genital-measuring would be disturbing enough, what with the Russian nuclear dudes on high alert and prepared to unleash a season of glass on behalf of Captain KGB's flaccid phantasies.
But when you factor in the way global consciousness has been completely colonized to the point where people who didn't know Ukraine from a whooping crane 6 days ago are suddenly all over social media, proclaiming themselves to be lifelong Brookings Institute foreign policy Fellows, this all becomes grounds for leftists like me to get a Space Passport and consider the move to the Tau Ceti sector.

Hint: they're really just repeating Neoliberal, Russophobic, Cold War-profiteer talking points straight from 1952 off their favorite infotainment news channel, that may as well have a Lockheed Martin watermark on the screen 24/7 while the chattering War Pigs bleat OINKily in their Gucci cufflinx and $20,000 haircuts. Just like always, or at least since Allen Dulles sent Jackie out onto the trunk of that limousine in search of JFK's cerebellum.
It's the auto-infantilized, bicamerally pea-brained, Afterschool Special-as-written-by-Kissinger-on-LSD mind control aspect that fucks me all the way up, honestly. Why can't they all suck? Can't Putin be a craven criminal with a secret Grindr ID, and the US-installed puppet-du-jour (hot as he is) be just another in a long series of them, designed and implemented to bring your gastank closer to a reunion with our oil that somehow got underneath their sand and land?

Why does it have to devolve so gravitationally into the insta-pussyhatted, Good (TM) vs. Evil (R) center of the existing moral universe, that must dominate all thought and opinion, just because CIANN or MICNBC pimp it for Northrop-Grumman and Raytheon on your TV that way.... just like they pimped COVID for two years on behalf of Pfizer and Moderna up to only last Tuesday?

I guess it must be because a whole lot of minds -- left, right and in the chewy, Tootsie Roll center -- are currently as manipulably complicit as any humans ever to have existed... and why wouldn't they be, having been subjected to an onslaught of constant disinfo, over so many decades, that would make anyone's head rotate at a brain-copulating 69 RPM? It's all of the bourgeoisie since time began, I know... but Americans, in particular, are to elite-engineered credulity what ducks -- the sitting kind -- are to water.
I swear if I live to be 100,000 plus one day, I will never understand how it isn't as evident as water's washable wetness to people that there can be no such thing as information under Capitalism, and that only propaganda is possible where the profit motive calls the diluted, deluded cheap shots.

Anyway, I hope this will all blow over in a few days and the "news" channels can get everyone on to the next Unprecedented Existential Crisis For Profit. Maybe I can get a Naomi Klein "Disaster Capital" safety vest or something outta the deal.

But being 1/2 Ukrainian by birth, I thought that if everyone is, all of the sudden, so implacably passionate for Ukraine, you'd like a sweet taste of this hardcore punk band from the UK -- creatively named The Ukrainians -- that plays punkified traditional folk songs of that nation... in addition to covers of The Smiths, The Sex Pistols and The Velvet Underground translated into the Ukrainian language.

The Ukrainians
Warsaw, Poland

01 introduction
02 Cherez Richku Cherez Hai
03 Ty Zh Mene Pidmanula
04 Anarkhiya
05 Chervona Rozha Troyaka
06 Teper Mi Hovorymo
07 UkrainAmerica
08 Horila Sosna
09 Batyar
10 Oi Vydno Selo
11 Rospryahaite
12 Chekannya
13 Durak
14 Kievskiy Express
15 Nalyvaimo Brattya
16 Oi Na Hori
17 Polityka
18 Zavtra
19 Europa
20 Arkan
21 Reve Ta Stohne Dnipr Shyrokyy
22 O Ukraino
23 Oi Divchino
24 Tsyhanochka
25 Dosytʹ Vakantnyy
26 Sertsem i Dusheyu
27 Vorony
28 Cherez Richku Cherez Hai
29 Anarkhiya
30 Verkhovyno

Total time: 1:58:00
disc break goes after Track 16

Peter Solowka - guitar & vocals
Dave Lee - drums, percussion & vocals
likely with
Allan Martin - bass & vocals
Michael L.B. West - mandolin, guitar, percussion & vocals
Stefan Tymruk - accordion & vocals
Len Liggins - violin, percussion & vocals
an unidentified lady audient - vocals, Tracks 28 & 29

unspecified digital capture of unknown generation, direct from the desk
likely a master DAT or Nomad type recording
slightly declipped, retracked & retitled by EN, March 2022

This wild set, which went on for two hours as a vicious blizzard raged through Eastern Europe, was recorded 19 years ago today and I could not resist employing it to implore everyone who isn't already to Please Think Critically.

I'll return on the weekend to unleash the Beaver, and also a show so Funkafized I can't even type about it without taking off all my clothes. But today, we sing O Ukraino! And we hope all parties get to the Peace Table and put in the proper effort, as we hope Putin gets the f outta there before I publish his Grindr password on the front page of Pravda. скоро прийде!!--J.

1 comment:

  1. ...and if anyone's mad I wrote this, just be glad I didn't title it "Ukraine Drops Keep Fallin' On My Head" like I was gonna :D~